Well, the day finally came. My last day at work and this was up at my desk when I walked in on Friday. It was so unexpected and really put a smile on my face. When I came downstairs to the canteen for the big farewell drinks, there were photos printed and stuck up on all the walls chronicling my journey over the years. Again, I was so pleasantly surprised.
I am so touched by the outpouring of affection that my last week at work showed me. I was not expecting all the fuss, all the tears from my colleagues and so much thoughtfulness in my send-off. Again, at drinks on Friday night I ended up in tears. Why? Because for years I was told the opposite. For years I was told that people viewed me in a certain way - moody, unhappy, miserable, etc. I was told all sorts of negative things that eventually I believed no-one really liked me. Despite the fact that I knew I had made many friends along the way, and there are still friends there that I will keep in touch with after I've left. If I was so bad to be around, why would so many people be friends with me? However, when you are told something over and over again, you start to believe it. In fact, it was part of the reason (not the main reason) I decided to leave. I got so fed-up with hearing all the crap, that one fine day I said to myself, well fine, I'll leave then and hopefully that will make everyone happy.
So the day comes that I leave, and there is all this fuss and hoo-ha - WTF?? So people actually did like me then. So many people leave that company without this much fuss. They even moved month-end drinks up a week just for my farewell.
For some reason, this company's management feels the need to break you down while you there, and only show you how much they appreciate you once you leave! Seriously. May I just clarify and say, the negative information was only given by my manager, not by all the people I worked with. She, however, made it sound like this was how EVERYONE perceived me, when really, it may only have been 3 or 4 people.
I received this text message from a colleague: "You do not realise how many people you touched and how many will miss you."
She's right, I didn't. But I do now. I am so humbled by that thought. How many of us realise what we mean to other people? And why do people only express that when that person moves on or when someone dies? In the case of death, that person can't hear all the good things you say in your eulogy.
I have gained an important lesson from this experience.
Believe it or not, I have not believed that before.I've learnt that I am someone special, that I do make a difference in this world and that I am worthy of friendship and love.
I have also learnt that it is important to express your gratitude and love for those around you while they are with you.
And somewhere amidst the drinks and tipsiness, I ended up having heart-to-heart chats with four people I had unresolved issues with; plus after 4 years of hating each other, me and one colleague finally made up!
What a night!